Some dreams are never true

Red Heart


MY FIRST CRUSH

It had to occur at least once. It happened sixteen years back. “What a pretty girl!”, she seemed to be. A lovable companion to relish for ever. Gracious gestures to fellow mates. Decently dressed in green school uniform, sparkling eyes filled with pride. Despite of the fact that there was everyone, however for the moment how lonely I felt myself when she left the place.

I never wanted to come out of my dream sequence and even didn’t realised when I started talking to myself. I became angry to her still without knowing her, I doubted her rational looks for a while for not understanding my irrational emotions. I didn’t found any chance to present my love to her. I wanted to wait her for lives. The thought of departing her was enough to cry. I intended to be like her man and started competing with my own mind’s eye. Now when I look back I realize that she never existed as a whole she was my imagination, and still my greatest source of inspiration. At this era, the hormonal changes or whatever I was going through, her slightest thought thrilled me like anything. This was the moment when I accepted that why the love recipe shown in our movies time and again, clicks without fail. I could experience the intensity of my love for her in the harmony of spirit and mind. I saw her first time in a crowded local city bus.

MY SECOND CRUSH

When I was young I dreamed for the day when I’ll become six feet tall muscular macho man. I’ll do what ever I wish. At this time nobody shall instruct me. I’ll be self guided. It was the time when I changed my first job and maybe somewhere subconsciously realized that I am heading towards my middle age. Though decisive enough I gave room for every one to guide me up. Unfortunately during my way to this time I have not encountered my childhood dream macho man.

In this disturbed temperament I along with my like minded friend who was also my colleague encountered a gorgeous girl student, as we were into teaching business. After little tug of war between us it was obvious that I was the lucky one. While returning home I walked with her so many times on the mall. Females have got a decent behaviour and style weapon to kill males and some have really mastered this skill. I ignored every negativity in her and was planning the ways to propose her. All of my colleagues boosted me to go ahead. The day came when I invited her to my house along with all my colleagues but unfortunately she was not able to make it out.

To compensate this she called me to her house on a lunch. The lunch was very formal and silent and that was my last individual meet with her. I was astonished by her unenthusiastic body language for the moment. Our relationship was so feeble that I saw her only couple of times after that. With a big smile on our face we restricted ourselves to a modest ‘Hello’. I remained a good teacher for her.