The 21st day of July 1989 seems to be some meaning for me. Whenever I put my initials on papers this is the date which flashes in my head and I put it instead of current date. This might be some conditioning or practice done by me during the formation phase of my initials. Any ways it often surprises me.
In my struggling frustrated youth, despite of the fact that I was a mediocre student I was imposed with a dream to become ‘Medical Physician’ by myself. To guide me for the preparations of becoming an Expert of Medicine some one very sweet and charming family friend girl appeared in front of me. She seemed to be a fairy and, mesmerized me for a while. My heart throbbed on every wink of her big eyes. It was quite same at her end, which I realized lately.
She kept on visiting me at my place frequently. During her visits I kept absolutely thoughtless due to my Ten Thousand complexes. My behaviour and gestures portrayed me as a very generous, polite, serious personality with a keel and my complexes became my style statements. This young woman who was one year elder to me was so engrossed in guiding me that she never became conscious that I infatuated her.
I was wearing so many shackles that on her circuitous proposal I failed to accept her. During our whole dialogue both of us were completely silent. I broke her heart and she cried and cursed me such that I was in a state of indisposition for a long time and failed to achieve my targets and eventually changed my career path to Information Technology
During a Hindi Lesson with Bohunka & Jozef Brenkus
In the month of March & April this year. I got an opportunity to teach Hindi lessons to a lovely couple from Republic of Czechoslovakia. Both were very hardworking and keen to learn hindi and it was a lovely experience for me too. During the course I realized our vocal chords develop quite differently depending on the area where we live and grow. There were certain pronunciations which were almost impossible for them and it was same for me as well to pronounce some of their words. The same happens with our taste buds. I guess western people yake some tome to adopt to Indian food.
Being an elder brother my childhood elapsed in giving instructions to my little brother. This mode was quite obvious because most of the times our parents were out at work. To instruct him was my biggest responsibility which later shaped my personality and character.
Being a mediocre mind but I always aspired to become an ideal or a good source of inspiration. I am fond of writing letters. Despite of the fact that in our age there is scarcity of time, I tried to write inspiring letters to my pen friends but always struggled to receive replies on time.
When initially the suggestion of blogging was given to me, I initiated it with MHR with a procrastinating frame of mind. I decided to write it on weekly basis and thought it to be a nice idea to even increase my knowledge base, secondly to keep in touch with fellow mates. Lately the format of MHR inspired me to write posts some times even twice a day. My big source of inspiration is Japanese spiritual leader ‘Josei Toda’ who is writing on every single day from last so many years. His explanation is unique and remarkable every time.
In MHR my resolute was to write regarding ideas only. Even though my determination stands still in this blog but over here I have to give some room for events and people. After listening to my readers I decided to come out of my shell of inspirational metaphysics. Instead of generalizing it like MHR I’ll try to make it more personal.
The only complaint I have from blogging is my suffering from shortage of time. For every post I think that it can be done in three thousand better ways. At times I am completely lost, I don’t realize it is due to my poor writing skill, my indecisiveness or my greed to reach on the pinnacle.